Toddler

All Articles in the Category ‘Toddler’

Surviving Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety varies WIDELY between children. Some babies become hysterical when Mom is out of sight for a very short time, while other children seem to demonstrate ongoing anxiety at separations during infancy, toddlerhood, and preschool. I’ve got one of each in my home. The trick for surviving separation anxiety demands preparation, brisk transitions, and the evolution of time. I would suggest we parents suffer as much as our children do when we leave. Even though we are often reminded that our children stop crying within minutes of our leave-taking, how many of you have felt like you’re “doing it all wrong” when your child clings to your legs, sobs for you to stay, and mourns the parting? As a working mom, separation anxiety creates questions for me. Although it is an entirely normal behavior and a beautiful sign of a meaningful attachment, separation anxiety can be exquisitely unsettling for us all. Here are facts about separation anxiety and 6 tips to improve the transitions I’ve learned the hard way (I’ve made about every mistake). Read full post »

5 Ways To Avoid Cavities And Still Feel Like A Celebrity

Dental caries (cavities) are preventable for most children. To keep those pearly whites pearly it takes being thoughtful about eating habits, brushing habits, drinking habits, and being knowledgeable about your child’s water supply. Although physicians are making robots to perform surgery and putting tiny cameras in our bodies to explore the inside, we may sometimes lose sight of easy, affordable ways to improve the lives of millions. Maybe we simply retreat from those prevention efforts…or maybe it’s something else.

The CDC reported this spring that for the first time in 40 years, preschoolers have more cavities than they did 5 years ago. And many children have so many cavities that they show up at the dentist with double-digit numbers requiring general anesthesia for repair. In one month alone, I’ve done a number of pre-op visits for dental anesthesia for patients in my clinic.

Many national headlines have covered this data over the last few months. And I would suggest there is one thing to stress here. Part of this increase in cavities may be a cultural issue, a parent-culture issue. That is, many parents may not be brushing their children’s teeth because of push-back from their children and a goal to maintain harmony at home. And many parents believe bottled water is safer than that from the tap. When it comes to teeth, that isn’t the case.

Sometimes we really have to act like adults and do the flossing.

I think this bump in cavity numbers is a parenting issue more than anything else. Read full post »

Concerns About Autism: Reasons To See The Pediatrician

When it comes to autism, we’ve all been rocked by the recent CDC data that found ongoing increases in the number of children diagnosed with autism annually; it’s estimated that 1 in 88 children has autism in the US. The rates are unfortunately higher for boys. The number is unsettling to say the least, particularly as the cause of autism is multifactorial and not entirely understood. Although we know genetics and family history plays a role, we don’t know what causes the majority of autism.

Read more about the science of autism from Autism Science Foundation.

We do know one thing: research proves the earlier you intervene to get a child additional services, the better their behavior, the better their outcome, and the better their chances for improved communication. You don’t need a diagnosis to access services for your child.

When you worry and can’t find resources online that reassure you, it’s time to check with your child’s clinician. That’s the point of a real partnership and a true pediatric home. Fight to find one if you don’t already have one. Fight to improve yours if it’s imperfect. The feedback I receive from families in my clinic allows me more leverage to make change. We’re all responsible for improved health communication…

Signs of Autism In Infants & Toddlers:

There is not one specific behavior, test, or milestone that diagnoses autism. More than any one behavior,

  • You should observe your infant demonstrating curiosity.
  • You should observe your baby expressing joy nearly every day after 4 months of age. Your child should smile when they are 2 months old, 4 months old, 6 months old and thereafter.
  • Your child should show you they know their name by 1 year of age.
  • You should see that your child tries to communicate thoughts more effectively with each month that unfolds during infancy and toddlerhood.

Here’s a list of specific Autism Warning SignsRead full post »

How Do Doctors Screen For Autism?

Pediatricians, nurse practioners, and family doctors start screening your baby or toddler for signs of developmental or communication challenges like autism from the very first visit. As a pediatrician, how your baby responds to you (and to me) during the various visits during infancy and toddlerhood guide me in their screening. In the office I get to observe how a baby giggles, how they look to their parents for reassurance, how they try to regain their mom’s attention during our conversation, how they point or wave, how they respond to their name, and even how and why they cry when I’m around. Those observations in combination with family history, health exams, and parental perspectives remain extremely valuable for me in helping identify children at risk for autism.

However, more formalized screening is recommended at both the 18 month and 24 month well child check. In most offices, clinicians use the M-CHAT, a 23-point questionare parents fill out. Often, I have to help parents answer one question in particular, (“Does your child make unusual finger movements by their face”) but other than that, most families find it easy to fill out. Using this standardized screening, pediatricians can pick up children at risk for autism and will be prompted to start conversations about language delay, concerns about behavior, or possible next steps for a toddler at risk with additional genetic, neurologic, or developmental testing.

It’s important to note that screening isn’t diagnosing. If your child has a positive screen for autism, it doesn’t mean they will be diagnosed on the spectrum. And further, if your child screens normally but you continue to worry about autism, don’t be shy. Read full post »

Reassuring Infant And Toddler Communication: When Not To Worry About Autism

Many parents worry about their child’s development at one point in time. With each of my boys, I had worries about their communication and thought their language delays or behaviors signaled something serious. That might just be the “worrier” in me, but it might just be the “mom” in me, too. Competitive parenting makes us all a little nuts…

Here’s a few signs that your child is developing great communication skills on time. However, if at any time you worry that your child isn’t expressing joy, communicating thoughts, or reflecting an understanding of your language, visual cues, and behavior talk with your child’s doctor. If you don’t feel heard or continue to worry, schedule another visit. If you still worry, contact another doctor for a second opinion. Instincts serve us very well when it comes to parenthood. Further, find some peace of mind if your child is doing many of the behaviors listed below!

Reassuring Developmental Milestones For Infants & Children

  • Responds to her name between 9-12 months of age.
  • Smiles by 2 months, laughs and giggle around 4-5 months, expresses great joy to your humor around 6 months.
  • Plays and thinks peek-a-boo is funny around 9 months of age.
  • Makes eye contact with people during infancy.
  • Tries to say words you say between 12 and 18 months of age.
  • Your toddler uses 5 words by 18 months of age.
  • Copies your gestures like pointing, clapping, or waving.
  • Imitates you — ie pretends to stir a bowl of pancake mix when you give them a spoon and bowl or pretends to talk on the phone with a play cell phone.
  • Shakes head “no.”
  • Waves “bye-bye” by 15 months of age.
  • Points to show you something interesting or points to get your attention by 18 months of age.

Flying With Toddlers: Tips For Distraction, Tips For Tantrums

Flying with toddlers is far more difficult than flying with an infant in my opinion. It’s the need to get up, run the aisles, move around, have another snack, read a different book, take an abbreviated nap, go pee, and that minute-attention span that makes it not only exhausting but nerve-racking for most of us. Although the challenge is real, success comes with having a good plan, allowing extra time, and packing the right snacks, toys, and books to keep your toddler occupied. That 3,000 mile flight at 30,000 feet can be a ton of fun! The above tip came from a friend years ago. Prepare for the worst and expect the best when flying with toddlers–hopefully this blue tape idea sticks. (ha)

Now dealing with tantrums while up in the air is another challenge in and of itself. Many of us heard about the toddler kicked off an airplane, and have also heard about the opinion for commercial airline children-free flights. Although I wholeheartedly disagree that we should segregate flights by age, I do think these stories in the news media elevate our anxiety for flying with our children. Don’t let it. You’re always the best one to support and help your child on the ground or up in the air. Don’t let the public shake that truth. My tips for dealing with tantrums at 35,000 feet aren’t very different from those on the ground: provide consistency, provide distraction, and provide comfort. But more, set yourself up for success by clearing the tension with passengers sitting next to you ahead of time. Acknowledge the challenge. I’ve found it not only decreases my own anxiety, it allows for a much better reception when things don’t go as planned.  Click to read full post for my additional 1-minute video explanation and a few ideas. What are yours? Read full post »

Cocoon A Newborn, Only An Email Away

This week, Washington State declared that whooping cough (pertussis) has reached epidemic levels. Since the beginning of the year, we’ve had more than 600 documented cases in the state, a dramatic increase since last year. The increase puts our new babies at risk.

In clinic I’ve been urging new parents to cocoon their babies. That is, provide a family of protection by having every single child & adult immunized against whooping cough, influenza, and other vaccine preventable illnesses. By surrounding a baby with only immunized people, you cocoon them against serious infections.

Whooping cough is a highly infectious respiratory illness spread by sneezing and coughing that can be deadly to young infants. Getting a Tdap shot is the best way to avoid getting whooping cough. Amidst an epidemic, we worry most about newborns because they are most vulnerable to complications and lack vaccine-protection. If every child and adult that surrounds a newborn gets a Tdap shot, the likelihood of the baby getting whooping cough approaches zero.

Most newborns get whooping cough from their family or adults around them. That’s where an email comes to play.

You’re going to have to be fairly Mama-Papa-Bear about this. You’ll have to show some strength to create a very safe home, even when it feels somewhat over-the-top. As I said to a number of families in clinic today, “It only seems entirely over-the-top-nuts until we lose another newborn to pertussis.” Being smart now will save lives.

Make a new rule: no visits with a newborn until all visitors have had the Tdap shot. Even Grandparents.

Write an email to family and friends to explain.

A sample email for you to use/copy/share –written today by a friend of mine–mother to that darling baby girl born last week: Read full post »

All Grandparents Need A Tdap

Some of my best friends are about to have a baby, the due date only a few weeks away. I’m teary thinking about it as my excitement for her arrival exceeds the speed limit. They asked my opinion this week for getting their extended family immunized in light of the recent Whooping Cough (pertussis) outbreak in our area. I advised them that all teens and adults (including grandparents) need a Tdap shot before they are with the baby. Even pregnant women are getting immunized after 20 weeks gestation to protect their newborns at and after birth.

Ideally, everyone should have the Tdap shot at least 2 weeks before the baby arrives.

My friends advised their parents. But both grandmas were turned away–one here in the US and one abroad. Each were told by a physician that they didn’t need the Tdap shot because they were over 65 years of age.

That physician was wrong. Whooping Cough (pertussis) knows no age. And immunization recommendations for pertussis protection have changed this past year because of rising rates of infection and infant deaths.

The best way to protect a newborn baby from getting Whooping Cough is to cocoon them with family and friends who are immunized against it.

Here is an overview on protecting your family from Whooping Cough.  <——Share this link with friends having new babies.

All grandparents, all adults, and all teens need a Tdap shot before holding a newborn baby.

Ask questions, please. And one more thing, can you suggest girl names? My friend is beside herself that they don’t have one picked out…I’ll buy you coffee if you suggest the name she chooses (hint: use a real email)

Toddler Sleep: Early Morning Awakenings

Every week in clinic families ask me about strategies to help with children who awake before the sun is up. We all thrive with improved, uninterupted, prolonged periods of sleep at night. Particularly on those Saturdays where an extra hour or two of sleep can be life-sustaining for exhausted parents to toddlers and preschoolers. Because of our boys’ early schedules, late last year Santa conveniently dropped off an incredible tool: a toddler teaching clock. The clock has helped our 3 year old know when 7 o’clock rolls around. And we’ve made a deal with boys for 2012: no leaving their bedroom until 7 appears on the screen. And so far, it’s working–we’re batting about .900. Learning to play quietly on their own in the early morning has been a great benefit, too.

Toddlers and preschoolers between 1 and 3 years of age need about 11 to 13 hours of total sleep within 24 hours (night time and nap combined). Sometimes no matter what time bedtime starts, early morning awakenings continue to happen. As many parents learn, moving bedtime later doesn’t always shift the time a child awakens in the morning. But with time, shifts in schedules sometimes improve that Saturday morning sleep…

Dr. Craig Canapari, a pediatric pulmonologist and sleep expert in Boston helps explain some reasons for these uber-early wake-ups and what we can do about it:

Why does my toddler get up so early in the morning?

Read full post »

Toddler Sleep: 4 Reasons Toddlers Wake Up At Night

There is a lot of writing online about how to get your baby to sleep through the night during infancy but not as much expertise to help those of us with toddlers and preschoolers who wake a number of times. Between age 2 and 3 when O was released from crib jail and moved to a big bed, he’d come to find me a couple of times a night. I’d often awake (and startle) to find him standing next to my bed! I tried many things to improve his opportunity for a full night’s sleep yet for those kids who never quite figure out that sleeping through the night starts around 7 or 8pm and ends with the sun coming up around 7am, we want to help. Recent data shows that 1 in 5 infants who have trouble sleeping may continue to have challenges during the toddler years. Clearly challenges with sleep that span multiple years affect many of us.

I turned to a pediatric sleep expert for help. Dr. Craig Canapari is a doctor I met on Twitter (of all places) who answered questions surrounding sleep challenges for toddlers. Dr Canapari is a father to 2, a pediatric pulmonologist & sleep expert, and is thinking of starting a blog! He told me that when he was a kid he, “definitely did have problems falling asleep sometimes,” so not only is he an expert, he’s experienced! Check out his responses here and leave comments and questions — I’ll get him back on the blog to respond as needed.

Why does my toddler wake up at night?

Every parents has experienced the dreaded 2 AM call. You hear your little one stirring on the monitor. Either you wait, fingers crossed, to see if they go back to sleep and they don’t, or you run in there as fast as you can to stuff the pacifier in their mouth before they really wake up. Most babies are capable of sustained sleep (6-8 hours in a row) at night by age six months. If you are nursing your child, it may take them a bit longer to achieve this. I think that it is reasonable that every child should sleep through the night most nights by 9-12 months of age. Now, every child wakes up sometimes at night. I view the awakenings as a problem if they are more than a few minutes in duration, occurring multiple times at night, or resulting in significant daytime irritability for either the child or the parents.

If your child is having problematic nocturnal awakenings, there are a few possible causes: Read full post »