Last day of school this week. The backpack is nearly as big as his body; that’s no optical illusion and the body-to-backpack proportionality serves up a dutiful reminder for me that my little boy is still small. To me it feels like he’s perfectly diminutive amidst the big surroundings of his school– it’s boards and doors towering high enough to accommodate the 8th graders yet inclusive enough to welcome him gently into grade school.
It’s clear that as Kindergarten lands in the rear-view mirror my hearts aches. I know I’m supposed to celebrate his growth and accomplishment for finishing. And I do. Yet all I can think about today is the reality that now that he’s technically a first grader he is also a bona fide “school-aged boy.” In pediatrics that does mean something altogether different. In fact once a child is 6 years of age, we often tell families it’s fine to come in for well child care check-ups every other year, absent concerns, until a child is 11 years of age. Growth typically is steady and stable, children advance in school, and routines are made–this is “school-age.” Fortunately even though some of this time between 6 and 11 may be very routine, even in 1st grade, a friend reminded me last night, “They are still made to believe they are the center of the universe.”
Every parent ahead of us warns us about the speed of travel through parenthood. They reflect on the g-forces of time and the flash of light between Kindergarten and the day they find themselves standing in an archway with a mature child at the end of high school. Often those ahead of us couple the warning about the velocity with an instruction. “Savor this time,” they say. And so many of us do. We savor, we relish, we reflect, and we love. It isn’t always perfect and pretty, there are tantrums and accidents, mess-ups and failures, but we do savor and we really are present in the moment so often.
Sometimes I want to scream out that we parents (of young children) –we get it, too.
I’ll admit though that amidst the myriad of moments this past year that I have felt mindful and present, I’ve also had plenty of others where I lacked attention.